Some ways we can help people impacted by natural disaster
By Kim Deans
My heart goes out to the thousands of people being impacted in south east Queensland and the north coast of NSW by devastating flooding. These reflections on how we can best help those impacted by natural disasters have been inspired by our own personal experience of being impacted by natural disaster in the form of fire in February 2019.
It is obvious how the immediate impact of natural disaster brings trauma and extreme stress to the people in the affected communities. Disaster makes the familiar, unfamiliar as what was familiar becomes unrecognisable. These feelings of disorientation are reinforced by the sound of helicopters, emergency services, news reporters and sadly often an influx of sight seers. Initially the main priorities will be the urgent ones, dealing with human and animal welfare and immediate repairs to restore essential services before moving on to assessing damages and sorting out insurance claims. This is an ongoing process and those impacted may continue to find damages months later that were not initially obvious. Seemingly simple tasks can be hindered when so much has been destroyed.
In this exhausting space there is little time or energy for anything else. Yet at the same time it is likely those impacted will become overwhelmed with phone calls, messages and emails, as family and friends check in to see how they are, and what they can do to help. As those impacted become recipients of generosity they will be out of their comfort zone and it will add to the rollercoaster of emotions. Emotionally this period of time felt to me like being on a pendulum, swinging between devastation for what had been lost, and gratitude for what we still had. It was a time of chronic stress which resulted in memory loss and difficulty in concentrating. This is not a time for making major decisions and even focusing on simple tasks can be difficult. It took me around 2 - 3 weeks before I felt like my mind unscrambled enough to focus for any length of time. During this initial period, we noticed that we both became forgetful which is certainly not something we were accustomed to.
Those impacted will be in shock, overwhelm and processing a range of emotions from grief to gratitude. They may not have had a chance to take it all in and may not know what they need yet. We had many well-meaning people offering help that was well beyond where we were up to in the disaster recovery process. Offering to move stock when our yards were gone, offering to buy plants to restore our gardens when we had no water due to drought. While a phone call to check in on people impacted is a great idea don’t load them up with your own stress and worries they have enough of their own. The best thing you can do is listen and provide practical assistance.
Here are some suggestions of ways we can help those impacted by natural disasters, based on what we have experienced:
Listen – sharing our stories is therapeutic. Sharing the stories of what happened is part of the recovery process.
Be comfortable with a wide range of intense feelings – shock, sadness, anger, guilt, depression, relief, hope, acceptance… The body produces pain killing chemicals that produce the numbing feeling in the beginning which are released through tears so it’s important to cry. Don’t try to cheer people up, tell them that there are others worse off or placate or distract people from expressing the feelings that arise. The feelings that arise as a result of loss are a normal part of the healing process, failure to express them can result in more intense reactions and physical health conditions later.
Phone to let people know you care, but never to offload your worry and concerns onto them
Recognise the grief process and that everyone will deal with it differently
Recognise the impact that stress has on people’s cognitive function
Slow down, don’t look too far ahead. Allow plenty of time for everyone’s unique journey through the grief process
Empower those impacted instead of making decisions for them. Other people’s decisions may not be in someone’s best interests, well intentioned people can deprive others of the opportunity to go through the process in their own time.
Give cash not stuff. People who have lost so much may prefer to choose their own replacement items when they are ready
Provide practical assistance like help cleaning up, home cooked meals and fodder for animals.
Call in for a chat to see how they are doing, stop and spend money at the businesses in impacted communities. Don’t just drive past looking at the devastation like it is a tourist attraction.
Don’t ask people if they are all recovered yet – be it 6 months later, a year later or 5 years later! Realise it could take a decade or more for them to feel like they are through it.
Stay the course and support people to recover at a pace that is right for them